Oh, Felicia...

What the fuck is wrong with you that you need attention SO badly, that you ask painfully shitty questions?  ...He's a veteran, retired, and his wife (whom he met in high school) passed away 3 years ago (on this very day, as a matter of fact, when he's trying to distract himself by helping us).  Have respect enough for all that to not reopen that wound, by asking him how his wife died, because you're "showing concern."  That is not your fucking place or even your level.  Shut the motherfucking fuck up!  If he wanted to talk to you about it, he would have brought it up to you.  ...Try, "How are you doing?" and simply leave it at that!!!  FFS.

Oh, but I can't end it there, dismally.  After I confronted you about all this (in a much nicer way), you tell me that you don't interact with others much anyway, and I reply, "Maybe you should stick to that plan," based on the gravity of the situation ... But then he later thanked me for telling you all that, because you went out of your way to talk about it (and disrespectfully rehash it even more so) AMOTHERFUCKINGGAIN to him?!  

...What the total fuck?  Do I need to abase to "speaking your language" and innocently ask you shitty existential questions about your life, to prove a point?

It's fine, tho.  You can't fix stupid.  

And you don't need to listen to me.  I don't claim to know everything ...But I do see thru your bullshit.  

May you be blessed and wake from your broken negativity record, so we can all move on in a happier (although, I'd settle for mediocre) and more productive manner.  

Fuckin' A.

---> I can't fucking read this!

Mental Illness Is NOT Contagious, But Recovery Is!

I suffer from the first mental illness, and my life has been affected by toxic people with these other illnesses!!! (not Bipolar I, tho)  ...The science and psychology behind these things is fascinating.

What is Bipolar II Disorder?

• Days without sleep or "tunnel vision." 
• Unnecessarily ruminating on negative thoughts. 
• Racing thoughts, sometimes kept at bay while listening to music in order to focus better (can often do things like listening to music, television, and be doing something entirely else, all at once). 
• High intelligence &/or artistic ability.

• https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319280.php

• https://www.webmd.com/bipolar-disorder/guide/bipolar-2-disorder#1

• https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/bipolar-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20355955

• https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK519704/table/ch3.t23/

What is the difference between Bipolar I & Bipolar II?

• II is higher functioning (doesn't necessarily need medicine to manage illness).
• II is more depressed than happy.
• II's bouts of happiness are never really that ecstatic.

• https://www.psycom.net/bipolar-disorder-difference-one-two

• https://www.verywellmind.com/bipolar-disorder-overview-378810

What is the difference between Borderline Personality Disorder & Bipolar II Disorder?

• A Borderline's episodes are based on multiple episodes of trauma, to the point where they disassociate so completely, they project it onto a select few (or even themselves, physically) in order to "deal with it."
• If a Borderline has children, there will often be a golden child.
• Bipolars are much more stable in emotional situations, when they are not suffering from an episode.
• Bipolar is in the nervous system, Borderline is in the psychological level of the mind.

• https://healthmatters.nyp.org/understanding-difference-bipolar-borderline-personality-disorder/

• https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/borderline-personality-disorder-bipolar-disorder#1

What is narcissism?

• Narcissists are all about themselves and how they are represented.  Anything less than perfect is subject to negative behavior stemming from the narcissist, including (but not necessarily limited to) abuse of all variations.
• Children will become extensions of a narcissist, as they are valued as property and not viewed as autonomous beings.
• Narcissists can become very controlling of the people involved in any type of relationship with them.

• https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20366662

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/resolution-not-conflict/201210/are-you-narcissist-6-sure-signs-narcissism

• https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/communication-success/201409/10-signs-youre-in-relationship-narcissist

What is gaslighting?

• When an abuser denies or spins the truth while manipulating the person they are abusing into believing they are insane, and that only the abuser's "truth" is valid.

• https://www.thehotline.org/what-is-gaslighting/

• https://www.dictionary.com/browse/gaslight

What is dissociation?

• When you cannot leave or fight in a traumatic situation, your only option is to freeze (to become "a deer in headlights").  Sometimes when this is done, in order to survive, you have an "out-of-body" experience to avoid the pain of the trauma.  

• https://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/conditions/dissociation-and-dissociative-disorders

• http://trauma-recovery.ca/impact-effects-of-trauma/dissociation/

What is nature versus nurture?

• Was it inherited or is it a learned behavior?  ...Odds are, it's a mix of both.  But here are some interesting articles anyway... 

• https://www.simplypsychology.org/naturevsnurture.html

• https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-nature-versus-nurture-2795392

• https://www.darwins-theory-of-evolution.com/ 

• https://www.livescience.com/474-controversy-evolution-works.html

• https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2005/05/050525105357.htm

• https://www.psychologicalscience.org/publications/observer/obsonline/harlows-classic-studies-revealed-the-importance-of-maternal-contact.html

• https://pages.uoregon.edu/adoption/studies/HarlowMLE.htm

• https://www.simplypsychology.org/classical-conditioning.html

• https://www.ashwoodrecovery.com/blog/finally-stop-cycle-abuse/

• https://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifehack/how-to-stop-the-negative-spin-of-thoughts-emotions-and-actions.html

What are the social personality types?

• If we could classify humans into different categories, you could say there are alphas, betas, deltas, gammas, sigmas, and omegas.
• ...Yes, just like packs of wolves *rolls eyes*
• The pecking order seems to depend on who you ask, how you feel at the time, or what the environment is.

• https://herway.net/life/alpha-vs-beta-vs-gamma-vs-omega-vs-delta-vs-sigma-personality-type/
• https://childneedsfather.com/alpha-beta-gamma-delta-omega-sigma-personality
• http://www.pollplace.com/quiz.cfm?action=go_detail&obj_id=254891&filter=popular&time_span=latest&sub_action=take
• ...And it is possible to change from an omega to a sigma: https://hackspirit.com/sigma-male-11-things-they-do-and-how-you-can-become-one-too/

Where does one go for support?

• There are many places.  You are not alone!  Here are a few:

• https://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/
• https://lifespanintegration.com/ 

• https://www.thesecret.tv/ 

• https://youtu.be/f3isjlvccc0

• https://www.healthyplace.com/insight/quotes/quotes-on-abuse 
• https://psychcentral.com/lib/10-way-to-build-and-preserve-better-boundaries/ 

• https://secondlife.com/destination/survivor-s-suicide-project 

• https://slnewser.blogspot.com/search?q=survivors+of+suicide

• https://sos-secondlifegroup.home.blog/

• http://www.ascasupport.org/index.php

• https://www.bpdcentral.com/support-groups/
  ("ctrl" + "f" and search "WTOAdultChildren")

So.. homework.. give it out
When you get past the initial dating phase..
And the guy decides that yes, he'd like to pursue a relationship with you..
Give him homework
Make it mandatory
Because you're worth at least that much
Have him go to websites that you've found
Both for people who suffer from what you have
And for family/friends of people who have your issues
If he isn't willing to do that.. to put some serious study time in and talk to you about what he learned.. that's your first and most important red flag
And then from there, take things very slowly
Build something with him
And watch how he reacts to things
If he cares about you, he'll understand your issues, and your past and he'll want to make you comfortable
If he doesn't.. kick him to the curb

And here are some scans of affirmations and coping skills that can benefit everyone!

---> I can't fucking read this (and am going to miss out on the unicorn)!